True Colors

This has been one of those weeks of seeing my heart's true colors and they are not pretty. A week of seeing the gross places of my heart over and over. A week of feeling like Paul when he writes in Romans 7:18 "For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not. For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want." A week of feeling at times dragged down and guilty and hopeless in the presence of such gross places. But then also a week of being reminded of grace and that I do not live under condemnation and that I am free of this and that though I am incapable, the Lord is able. A week of seeing my complete and total need. A week of hard and good. A week that I am glad is behind me, but that I know I will walk through again and again. And there are places within this place for which I can be thankful.