I am nearing on one week to go and am vacillating between thankfulness and excitement and nerves. Today the nerves were winning. Yesterday the awe was winning. I am just trying to take it one day at a time, really one hour. This morning I was wrecked with nerves about details, stuff that really doesn't matter or will be easy to figure out. I had to stop and read some words of truth and continue to speak them to my nervous heart.
Yesterday I was just riding the thankfulness wave. I have been amazed to see how God has worked out so much to make this happen. You know how you say, I hope that God will show me when it is time to fill in the blank? Well I say that, probably because I am a scaredey cat when it comes to change. I have been saying and thinking for 6 months that if change was needed God would make it clear. And he most certainly has. From sending me an amazing counselor to encourage me to listen to my heart, to great friends who have been so supportive of this, to details like having someone to rent my apartment when I didn't even really ask and finding my own housing at the last minute, to finishing my journal right at the end of a chapter of life :). There are just so many ways that God has very clearly shown me it is time for change...You can handle it, I will bring you my peace and I will take care of it.
Trying to remind myself of this in the midst of the details that are hanging in the air and the emotions that are coming out of nowhere....
Still singing these words from one of our worship songs yesterday to myself:
"Hallelujah, What a Savior!"
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